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Sad Story: "Tearful Andrew Luck Hugs Knees ...

Smonroe

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Smonroe

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This is why they shouldn't fight in front of the kids.

 

Tearful Andrew Luck Hugs Knees To Chest While Listening To Chuck Pagano, Ryan Grigson Fighting Downstairs
 September 30, 2015

INDIANAPOLIS—Cowering in the dark at the top of the locker room steps, a tearful Andrew Luck reportedly hugged his knees to his chest Wednesday while listening to Colts head coach Chuck Pagano and general manager Ryan Grigson fighting downstairs. “They’ve been yelling for a while, and I’m pretty sure I heard them say ‘Andrew,’” said the visibly distraught quarterback, shuddering as the sound of raised voices echoed loudly in the stairwell. “Mr. Grigson was shouting that he signed enough talent and coach doesn’t know what to do with it. Then coach screamed ‘I can’t stand this anymore’ and ‘I hate you.’ Why can’t they just stop fighting all the time?” Luck then reportedly began trembling after hearing a loud crash followed by a disconcerting silence.

 

 

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shakedownstreet Hall of Famer

shakedownstreet

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You need to lighten up. This was in the onion. You know, a joke?

 

you just know there'll be quite a few who'll use this thread as a springboard to whine about the o-line, coaching, talent evaluation, etc :)

 

posts about our AWFUL offensive line are about as original as jim caldwell's latest facial expressions

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radiogirl Walk On

radiogirl

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This is why they shouldn't fight in front of the kids.

 

Tearful Andrew Luck Hugs Knees To Chest While Listening To Chuck Pagano, Ryan Grigson Fighting Downstairs

 

 September 30, 2015

INDIANAPOLIS—Cowering in the dark at the top of the locker room steps, a tearful Andrew Luck reportedly hugged his knees to his chest Wednesday while listening to Colts head coach Chuck Pagano and general manager Ryan Grigson fighting downstairs. “They’ve been yelling for a while, and I’m pretty sure I heard them say ‘Andrew,’” said the visibly distraught quarterback, shuddering as the sound of raised voices echoed loudly in the stairwell. “Mr. Grigson was shouting that he signed enough talent and coach doesn’t know what to do with it. Then coach screamed ‘I can’t stand this anymore’ and ‘I hate you.’ Why can’t they just stop fighting all the time?” Luck then reportedly began trembling after hearing a loud crash followed by a disconcerting silence.

 

Is this story real?  I read it too.  Seems a little dramatic for a grown man to be holding his knees and trembling?  Even my young teenage boys would tell them all to "suck it up!"

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radiogirl Walk On

radiogirl

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Apparently someone isn't familiar with the most famousest of fake news outlets. It's a satirical spoof on the various reports surrounding the perceived dysfunction of the Colts.

Good.  There is plenty of dysfunction right now.  But, this sounded more like a bad episode of the Brady Bunch!

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southwest1 Walk On

southwest1

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My only response to this article..."It's my party [as the franchise QB] & I'll Cry If I Want To." 

 

Not the funniest story I ever read as a loyal Onion subscriber, but then again, comedy is a volume business & not every joke soars...More like plummets. Yeah I know, both my music & comedy standards are very high. 

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shakedownstreet Hall of Famer

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My only response to this article..."It's my party [as the franchise QB] & I'll Cry If I Want To." 

 

Not the funniest story I ever read as a loyal Onion subscriber, but then again, comedy is a volume business & not every joke soars...More like plummets. Yeah I know, both my music & comedy standards are very high. 

 

yeah that's how comedy writing works. you make up 100 jokes and maybe 2 or 3 end up being pretty good

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DougDew Ring of Honor

DougDew

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Seriously, I've been in media for 30 years and still can't keep up with the influx of so many new news outlets, online outlets, blogs, etc.  I did laugh when I read it though!

Except The Onion has been around for at least 25 years. At least when it was local...Madison Wisconsin I think.
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ColtRider Walk On

ColtRider

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Is this story real?  I read it too.  Seems a little dramatic for a grown man to be holding his knees and trembling?  Even my young teenage boys would tell them all to "suck it up!"

Mine would've told them to "shut up" and act their age. Hey, apples don't always fall near the tree ... do they?

Edited by Nadine
skirting the filter
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southwest1 Walk On

southwest1

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Except The Onion has been around for at least 25 years. At least when it was local...Madison Wisconsin I think.

 

Yep, that's where it used to be published from DD & their writers used to have a harder edge operating from the Badger State that they never got back once they relocated unfortunately. 

I've tried & tried to like the onions brand of sarcastic social/political commentary...

but I rarely find it that funny...

I hear ya Buck. Their sports crossover stuff rarely works. They are usually better with political campaign or sex scandals on average. It's okay if you didn't crack a smile man. It just means you have discriminating tastes & don't fall for cheap laughs. The Onion used to be so innovative & comically sophisticated locally, but now she seems to have lost her mojo. Sad really. 

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ColtRider Walk On

ColtRider

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Mine would've told them to "shut up" and act their age. Hey, apples don't always fall near the tree ... do they?

Oh, come on ... I hear all you people out there laughing ... I was busting my gut when I typed it because it's true ... haha:) it's okay to respond, I promise. My kids tell it like it is, not like it's not. One of their Dear Ole Dad's traits.

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southwest1 Walk On

southwest1

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They need counseling. Grigs&Pags or The Onion...I'm not sure yet.

A Colts on the Coach segment like our former GM's "Polian's Corner" but satire to help fans deal with their team's frustrations, vulnerabilities,  front office squabbles, & SB stumbling blocks...

 

Yeah, I know the best franchises never air their dirty laundry in public...I only like my drama in movies as opposed to the field. Forget what I said.

 

If Frank Gore keeps coughing up the ball, I may need counseling though. At least anger management anyway. I'm kidding or I think I am anyway. Ask me after Thursday's Nights Game vs Houston. 

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OffensivelyPC Active Roster

OffensivelyPC

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you just know there'll be quite a few who'll use this thread as a springboard to whine about the o-line, coaching, talent evaluation, etc :)

 

posts about our AWFUL offensive line are about as original as jim caldwell's latest facial expressions

But seriously, our OL is awful and grigson should be fired yesterday.  Put me in coach!  /sarcasm

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Lol the amount of people that think this was a real story are hilarious haha

You do make a good point CF12. There is subtle sarcasm [which BHC excels at] & over the top sarcasm [which Ruksak & The Peytonator usually perform admirably.] Lollygagger8 is gifted at sarcasm too. 

 

It is a credit to the Onion that some fans asked is this for real? There's a fine line between propaganda and embellishment. But, I do applaud the writer's efforts at comic relief even when it falls short. 

 

I have to give Shakedownstreet credit too because in the middle of serious responses he will drop a line that hit me like a rogue baseball & makes me roll with laughter. Like a hidden Easter egg discovery. 

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ColtsBlueFL Team Captain

ColtsBlueFL

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But seriously, our OL is awful and grigson should be fired yesterday.  Put me in coach!  /sarcasm

 

Grigson should stand in a corner and Pagano grounded to his room.  Liver and onions with side of spinach for dinner,

and neither can leave the table until their plates are clean!!     /netnanny sarcasm mode off

 

I've tried & tried to like the onions brand of sarcastic social/political commentary...

but I rarely find it that funny...

 

Sometimes they are over the top for me.  A few others, they come close to the sarcastic mark.

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