Coping with the Loss

[coltsfeva]

Hey guys (and gals). I’m still in shock

   I was wondering how everybody’s coping with the disappointing ending of the season.

    I tell myself it’s only a game. But the feeling that comes initially is how long we’ll have to wait until next season. It stinks.
   But, what can you do but accept what happened (there’s a LOT more serious things that happen in life) and go forward. I believe in what they are putting together in Indy. This team has a solid core to build on and they will learn from this loss. I have hope for next year

 

    So, I’m coping by playing a lot of music and working on the house (I’m retired)  I’m a drummer so I’ve been playing with a lot of “feel good” songs like this one:

 

 Even though we have different opinions of what went wrong and what needs to be done to fix it, we are all feeling the effects of this shocker. Such is the risk we take when we become fans.

   So, are you over it and if not, how are you coping? Do you trust Ballard and Reich to fix this?

[RollerColt]

I'm depressed honestly. I haven't reached acceptance yet. My only solace is the Bengals are in the playoffs with a QB that actually seems to know what he's doing. 

 

I don't know how I feel about this team and it's direction moving forward. I don't think Reich is too bad as a head coach. I do think injuries and illness completely screwed us this year. And I think overall the players just let us down. I don't know how we can fix this mess where we have a better chance next year. We have another set of hard teams coming up for the 2022 season, including playing the God Forsaken Steelers again... 

 

I'm a musician as well. I'm drowning myself in guitar practice when I'm not in school teaching. 

[Yoshinator]

 

15 minutes ago, coltsfeva said:

Hey guys (and gals). I’m still in shock

   I was wondering how everybody’s coping with the disappointing ending of the season.

    I tell myself it’s only a game. But the feeling that comes initially is how long we’ll have to wait until next season. It stinks.
   But, what can you do but accept what happened (there’s a LOT more serious things that happen in life) and go forward. I believe in what they are putting together in Indy. This team has a solid core to build on and they will learn from this loss. I have hope for next year

 

    So, I’m coping by playing a lot of music and working on the house (I’m retired)  I’m a drummer so I’ve been playing with a lot of “feel good” songs like this one:

 

 Even though we have different opinions of what went wrong and what needs to be done to fix it, we are all feeling the effects of this shocker. Such is the risk we take when we become fans.

   So, are you over it and if not, how are you coping? Do you trust Ballard and Reich to fix this?

I honestly had no emotion towards this team by the end of the Jags game. It's like catching a girlfriend cheat on you on video and losing all interest or care for her. If you go by Ballard's tenure and the current situation, you should be able to figure out what will happen. We will fire some assistant coaches and maybe Eberflus as the fall guys, Ballard will do the same thing in FA as he always does, our salary cap will be smaller, we won't have a 1st round pick in the draft, and the team will remain largely the same with no new excitement except a few smaller FAs and our draft minus a 1st round selection.

 

The caveat will be if we keep Carson Wentz or not. That's what I can't tell you, and that will decide our future as a team. Do we give him another chance? Or do we release him and save 13.3 million and sign or trade for a veteran or draft a QB in round 2? That will be the most exciting decision IMO that this FO and Irsay makes this entire offseason, and it's a scary one that will be hard to go in our favor.

[cdgacoltsfan]

2 hours ago, RollerColt said:

I'm depressed honestly. I haven't reached acceptance yet. My only solace is the Bengals are in the playoffs with a QB that actually seems to know what he's doing. 

 

I don't know how I feel about this team and it's direction moving forward. I don't think Reich is too bad as a head coach. I do think injuries and illness completely screwed us this year. And I think overall the players just let us down. I don't know how we can fix this mess where we have a better chance next year. We have another set of hard teams coming up for the 2022 season, including playing the God Forsaken Steelers again... 

 

I'm a musician as well. I'm drowning myself in guitar practice when I'm not in school teaching. 

I'm quite sure the players have moved on. In fact, pretty sure they moved on before or just after the plane landed in Indy. 

[Fluke_33]

2 hours ago, coltsfeva said:

Hey guys (and gals). I’m still in shock

   I was wondering how everybody’s coping with the disappointing ending of the season.

    I tell myself it’s only a game. But the feeling that comes initially is how long we’ll have to wait until next season. It stinks.
   But, what can you do but accept what happened (there’s a LOT more serious things that happen in life) and go forward. I believe in what they are putting together in Indy. This team has a solid core to build on and they will learn from this loss. I have hope for next year

 

    So, I’m coping by playing a lot of music and working on the house (I’m retired)  I’m a drummer so I’ve been playing with a lot of “feel good” songs like this one:

 

 Even though we have different opinions of what went wrong and what needs to be done to fix it, we are all feeling the effects of this shocker. Such is the risk we take when we become fans.

   So, are you over it and if not, how are you coping? Do you trust Ballard and Reich to fix this?

I live in massachusetts surrounded by patriots fans and this is just another in a long line of embarrassing events from this team.  its a tough one.  Whenever someone says something about it i respond that that was last season for me (yes i mean the current one still being played)

 

However, i am an optimist and do believe that all ills will be cured.  I believe in ballard more than reich right now.   I don't know what they need to do but i hope it is something major.

[dw49]

I was just in disbelief the whole game. I do think the covid effected their play the last 2 games . However , I'm with everyone else that the QB position  is a real concern . Wentz's play in the last 4-5 games was terrible. 

[masterlock]

It's easy to fall into the trap of living vicariously through a sports team. For some people, it can even become an extension of their self-identity. My approach is to realize that it truly is JUST a game. My practical advice would be, when you feel the feeling coming on, don't fight it. Let yourself experience it, but then let it pass and shift your focus to something else. Don't cling to the feeling. 

[Colts1324]

1 hour ago, cdgacoltsfan said:

I'm quite sure the players have moved on. In fact, pretty sure they moved on before or just after the plane landed in Indy. 

If the players have moved on already, I want them ALL gone. We fans haven’t even began to move on… no way they have. 

[cdgacoltsfan]

6 minutes ago, Colts1324 said:

If the players have moved on already, I want them ALL gone. We fans haven’t even began to move on… no way they have. 

If you think they are sitting around crying and pouting like " we fans" ,I've got some land id like to sell you.

[Four2itus]

Spend your life creating. Use sports as a diversion from your creation. 

 

If you spend your life watching others create life, it can be empty. 

[AwesomeAustin]

I was over it in about 2hrs. If you play sports you will lose.  If you watch sports your team will lose.  I think we have only made the playoffs 50% of the time in the past decade.  I’m not sure why so many people are taking it so hard.  It just didn’t work out this year...move on lol.  

[ADnum1]

I think we are grieving for the loss of our season.  We had such high hopes for this season back in camp.

 

It is crushing and many of us are going through the 5 stages of grief.

 

Keep in mind that not everyone goes through the stages in the stated order.  And you can actually regress and go though different stages multiple times.

 

So what stage are you in ?

 

The 5 Stages of Grief

 

1. Denial and Isolation

When we lose someone or something important to us, it is natural to reject the idea that it could be true. In turn, we may isolate ourselves to avoid reminders of the truth. Others who wish to comfort us may only make us hurt more while we are still coming to terms with the loss.

 

2. Anger

When it is no longer possible to live in denial, it is common to become frustrated and angry. We might feel like something extremely unfair has happened to us and wonder what we did to deserve it. 

 

3. Bargaining

In this stage, we might somehow seek to change the circumstances of the situation causing their grief. For example, a religious person whose loved one is dying might seek to negotiate with God to keep the person alive. Bargaining may help the grieving person cope by allowing them a sense of control in the face of helplessness.

 

4. Depression

In this stage, we feel the full weight of our sadness over the loss. Feeling extremely down in the wake of a loss is normal; however, it is important to be aware that clinical depression is different from grief, and they are treated differently by mental health professionals. See “The Blurred Line Between Grief and Depression” for more information.

 

5. Acceptance

Eventually, the grieving person may come to terms with their loss. Accepting a loss does not necessarily mean the person is no longer grieving. In fact, many grief experts say that grief can continue for a lifetime after a major loss, and coping with the loss only becomes easier over time. Waves of grief can be triggered by reminders of the loss long after it has happened and long after the person has “accepted” it. These waves may also trigger a crossover into any of the other four stages of grief.

 

 

[BlackTiger]

1 hour ago, cdgacoltsfan said:

I'm quite sure the players have moved on. In fact, pretty sure they moved on before or just after the plane landed in Indy. 

Carson literally said it will take some time to get over it. he hasnt just moved on.

 

Darius leonard was heated too and made that pretty clear.  I think you were a little too dismissive here, they have not moved on that quickly

[Nadine]

4 hours ago, coltsfeva said:

Hey guys (and gals). I’m still in shock

   I was wondering how everybody’s coping with the disappointing ending of the season.

    I tell myself it’s only a game. But the feeling that comes initially is how long we’ll have to wait until next season. It stinks.
   But, what can you do but accept what happened (there’s a LOT more serious things that happen in life) and go forward. I believe in what they are putting together in Indy. This team has a solid core to build on and they will learn from this loss. I have hope for next year

 

    So, I’m coping by playing a lot of music and working on the house (I’m retired)  I’m a drummer so I’ve been playing with a lot of “feel good” songs like this one:

 

 Even though we have different opinions of what went wrong and what needs to be done to fix it, we are all feeling the effects of this shocker. Such is the risk we take when we become fans.

   So, are you over it and if not, how are you coping? Do you trust Ballard and Reich to fix this?

I've been binge watching Ted Lasso.  It is wonderful.

[RollerColt]

18 minutes ago, PRnum1 said:

I think we are grieving for the loss of our season.  We had such high hopes for this season back in camp.

 

It is crushing and many of us are going through the 5 stages of grief.

 

Keep in mind that not everyone goes through the stages in the stated order.  And you can actually regress and go though different stages multiple times.

 

So what stage are you in ?

 

The 5 Stages of Grief

 

1. Denial and Isolation

When we lose someone or something important to us, it is natural to reject the idea that it could be true. In turn, we may isolate ourselves to avoid reminders of the truth. Others who wish to comfort us may only make us hurt more while we are still coming to terms with the loss.

 

2. Anger

When it is no longer possible to live in denial, it is common to become frustrated and angry. We might feel like something extremely unfair has happened to us and wonder what we did to deserve it. 

 

3. Bargaining

In this stage, we might somehow seek to change the circumstances of the situation causing their grief. For example, a religious person whose loved one is dying might seek to negotiate with God to keep the person alive. Bargaining may help the grieving person cope by allowing them a sense of control in the face of helplessness.

 

4. Depression

In this stage, we feel the full weight of our sadness over the loss. Feeling extremely down in the wake of a loss is normal; however, it is important to be aware that clinical depression is different from grief, and they are treated differently by mental health professionals. See “The Blurred Line Between Grief and Depression” for more information.

 

5. Acceptance

Eventually, the grieving person may come to terms with their loss. Accepting a loss does not necessarily mean the person is no longer grieving. In fact, many grief experts say that grief can continue for a lifetime after a major loss, and coping with the loss only becomes easier over time. Waves of grief can be triggered by reminders of the loss long after it has happened and long after the person has “accepted” it. These waves may also trigger a crossover into any of the other four stages of grief.

 

 

Stage 4…

[MPStack]

[Four2itus]

10 minutes ago, MPStack said:

Whatever you do.....don't take the purple microdot!

 

(My friend heard this announced at a concert.....just after he took some)

[IinD]

I was over it halfway through the 4th. You could see we were done.

 

Good thing about sports is that there's always a next year.

[CoachLite]

 

[New Zealands #1 Colts Fan]

I have rewatched the buffalo and Patriots games several times. 

 

One good thing about this season is we will now make several changes to improve this team. 

I wonder if we had made the playoffs and say had a close loss to buffalo or Cincy then they would have rested on their laurels and not made many changes next season.

[NannyMcafee]

44 minutes ago, New Zealands #1 Colts Fan said:

I have rewatched the buffalo and Patriots games several times. 

 

One good thing about this season is we will now make several changes to improve this team. 

I wonder if we had made the playoffs and say had a close loss to buffalo or Cincy then they would have rested on their laurels and not made many changes next season.

 

One thing about that patriots game is the crowd showed up. Can't say I know thats true for any of the other home games. I think indy fanbase is soft. And who am I to say anything? I like watching football from my couch. 

[Never_Quit]

2 hours ago, AwesomeAustin said:

I was over it in about 2hrs. If you play sports you will lose.  If you watch sports your team will lose.  I think we have only made the playoffs 50% of the time in the past decade.  I’m not sure why so many people are taking it so hard.  It just didn’t work out this year...move on lol.  

 

 

It was a franchise defining loss. The worst I've seen in 20+ years of watching this team. We've had bad losses but they were usually to good teams that just outplayed us. Not so on Sunday.

[AwesomeAustin]

28 minutes ago, Never_Quit said:

 

 

It was a franchise defining loss. The worst I've seen in 20+ years of watching this team. We've had bad losses but they were usually to good teams that just outplayed us. Not so on Sunday.

That’s a little on the dramatic side. Charger fans are probably saying the same and they lost to a playoff team.  There have been way worse losses in the playoffs when we had a legitimate chance to win a SB.  We were getting bounced in the first or second round of playoffs anyways.  This is just a blip on a long history of Colts teams and will be forgotten soon enough.  It will be ok. 

[NannyMcafee]

11 hours ago, AwesomeAustin said:

That’s a little on the dramatic side. Charger fans are probably saying the same and they lost to a playoff team.  There have been way worse losses in the playoffs when we had a legitimate chance to win a SB.  We were getting bounced in the first or second round of playoffs anyways.  This is just a blip on a long history of Colts teams and will be forgotten soon enough.  It will be ok. 

 

Yeah but it wasn't vs the worst team in the league. 

[Imgrandojji]

18 hours ago, coltsfeva said:

Hey guys (and gals). I’m still in shock

   I was wondering how everybody’s coping with the disappointing ending of the season.

    I tell myself it’s only a game. But the feeling that comes initially is how long we’ll have to wait until next season. It stinks.
   But, what can you do but accept what happened (there’s a LOT more serious things that happen in life) and go forward. I believe in what they are putting together in Indy. This team has a solid core to build on and they will learn from this loss. I have hope for next year

 

    So, I’m coping by playing a lot of music and working on the house (I’m retired)  I’m a drummer so I’ve been playing with a lot of “feel good” songs like this one:

 

 Even though we have different opinions of what went wrong and what needs to be done to fix it, we are all feeling the effects of this shocker. Such is the risk we take when we become fans.

   So, are you over it and if not, how are you coping? Do you trust Ballard and Reich to fix this?

Knew it was a possibility.  Honestly didn't think it would happen.  

 

Untimately though while I didn't see this coming the signs were there.  This team is trying to find a quick way around the need for a homegrown QB and in the NFL shortcuts kill you. 

 

Wasting Luck's career is STILL hurting us and this game was probably the single greatest example of that.  Not having #12 out there cost us a playoff spot this year because Wentz, while talented, is emotionally fragile and just can't put the team on his back like Luck could.

 

I am also bitterly disappointed in the defense.  If they'd played up to their ability what Wentz did would have been more than enough to win.  Lawrence is talented but the Jacksonville offense as a whole was not.  What a time to lay an egg of that magnitude.

[AwesomeAustin]

37 minutes ago, NannyMcafee said:

 

Yeah but it wasn't vs the worst team in the league. 

Oh well.  It happens.  If we would have won other games it wouldn’t have mattered.  The team didn’t get it done several times this year when they had leads and should have won games.  The Titans, Ravens and Bucs losses stung way more to me.  To each their own I guess