The Ten Commandments of Colts Fandom

[BlueStallion]

Football is religion. Colts giveth. Colts taketh away.

There is only one Colts and no other.

 

To borrow on this theme, I offer the following blasphemy:

 

THE TEN COMMANDMENTS OF COLTS FANDOM

 

...And Jim spake and saeth unto the unwashed masses

 

1.  I am the Owner, whose Father brought your Team out of Baltimore, out of the land of misery.  Thou shalt have no other team before mine, for I am a jealous Owner.

 

2.  Thou shalt not wear unto thee any graven image other than a horseshoe.

 

3.  Thou shalt not take the name of the Colts thy Team in vain.

 

4.  Remember the Sundaeth day, to keep it holy.  Six days shalt thou labor...but the seventh day is for the Colts, thy Team.

 

5.  Honor thy father and thy mother, that they might buy you Colts gear and bring you with them to Colts games.

 

6.  Thou shalt not kill for Colts tickets.

 

7.  Thou shalt not commit adultery inside Lucas Oil Stadium, thy house of worship.

 

8.  Thou shalt not steal Colts tickets.

 

9.  Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbors to acquire their Colts tickets.

 

10.  Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's season tickets, nor his club seats, nor his parking space, nor his Colts jersey, nor his giant foam finger, nor anything that is thy neighbor's.

 

 

[HungarianColtsFan]

+1

 

Celebrate wins with Guinness...lighten the pain of loss with more Guinness!

[basketballsteve]

I think what you say here is heresy.

 

Many of us know that Carroll Rosenbloom is Yahweh and begat the Colts. He created a paradise for us all in 1958 and 1959 and this was all Colts fans true time in the Garden of Eden. Colt fans were driven from paradise by the cruel Pharaoh Robert Irsay. And while it is true that Colt fans suffered mightily under the harsh rule of Pharaoh it was not because they were in the land of Baltimore for Pharaoh followed the Colts to the new land of Indianapolis and Colts fans woes did not diminish but only grew. But the mighty Yahweh (having passed on in 1979) did finally hear our cries and Colt fans were delivered by Moses. So it was, that baby Moses (Jim Irsay) who witnessed Pharaoh's cruel rule first in Baltimore and later as a man in Indianapolis would receive a vision from a burning bush of his time as General Manager and spurning his father's interfering ways would restore ownership to the original intent of Yahweh. Setting down the 10 commandments listed here (for which I have no issue) a new era of plenty was established under the great rule of King David (Peyton Manning) and so it was that David did slay the great Goliath (Tom Brady) bring universal happiness to all Colt fans across all lands.

 

So Sayth Dark Matters

 

So Sayth Jeffory…………….and if anyone should know it's me I'm at God's right hand.

[sfergson727]

Is it time to get out the Holy Hand Grenade yet?  We can heave it in the general direction of the Jaguars.  We just need to find those instructions first....I think Sir Not Appearing In This Forum had them last.......

[chad72]

Thou shall not covet the Patriots, even if you have a grudge against Peyton and his lovers. Just throwing it out there .